Heather:
Sorry I did not make it plainer..
When you log onto your computer with your windows user name and password it is your windows account not your FTM account.
From your 1st post it sounded to me that your husband's windows xp account is a admin account, which means he has full rights to take full control of your PC even in the installing of software.
Once he logs into xp under his windows account, installs/runs the update patch .....you should be ok after you log back into windows xp under your username & password.
If this is the case you will have to update/install all future FTM updates under his windows account.
Hope this helps.
RSlack