Hi, CMascus,
Thanks for your post. I am in touch with Peggy McLemore and Cornelia Elrod, so assume you are, also. Yes, the census can be confusing; I suspect the census taker just took info from whoever answered the door. You are correct, Annie Self died young, and Herbert remarried an Ollie M. Williams. I have the Diffenderfer line back to the Swiss in the 1500s and before. They arrived in the US in 1727, nearly 50 years before the American Revolution, in which they served honorably, including at Valley Forge. They were very prolific, making them sometimes hard to trace, complicated by the large variety of spellings and many erroneous transcriptions.

On Herbert's mother's side, I have the Gray line back to the 1700s. The parents of Herbert Diffenderfer met at college in Mansfield, PA, in 1871 and were married in 1873. Matilda Moore Gray, b. ca. 1856, was named for a family friend, Matilda Moore. The Moore surname is not a blood line. Let me know what you're doing and your direct email, and I'll try to help you.
Laura